10 Items Recovered From The Lindsay Lohan Robbery

lindsay-lohan, celeb-jihad


Police have arrested a man named Nick Prugo for allegedly burglarizing Lindsay Lohan’s apartment (surprise; he’s supposedly her former coke dealer).

CelebJihad has obtained an exclusive list of the stolen items that police have recovered thus far.
 

  • Lindsay’s beauty and youthful appearance (although both were damaged beyond repair).
  • A RealDoll in the shape of FES from That 70’s Show.
  • The mummified head of her British “twin” from The Parent Trap.
  • 15,000 unopened copies of her album, A Little More Personal (Raw)
  • A picture of her and Michael Eisner at Knott’s Scary Farm marked “evidence”

  • A monkey’s paw with one wish remaining.
  • An autographed copy of the book, How To Get Famous, by Anne Heche
  • A DVD of Snatch (not the Guy Ritchie movie)
  • Samantha Ronsin’s favorite cock ring.
  • Herbie. Fully loaded. With Mescaline.

  • Special thanks to Eric Filipkowski, Jon Mitchell, and Marty Platinum.

    Did we forget any items? Let us know in the comment section.